29 Jun 2011

Thoughtful Wednesday: Words Can Make You or Break You!

*After I wrote this post I wanted to delete it because it is too personal, but I believe the time is right to let my heart out. Hope I am clear with my words :).*

Every time I read pages of my teenage diary, I thank God for making me strong inside and thick skinned outside when I can be, because some words I heard in the course of those years would have broken my willpower…Louis crib

The first time I cried because of a word was in grade three when a classmate said to me “Sei egoista (you’re egoist)!” I didn’t know the meaning of the word and he didn’t know it either. He has heard it before on TV, but when I heard it I cried. I cried my heart out without understanding the reason.

Later on my favourite teacher calmed me down and explained the meaning “It means selfish, self-centred… but you are not at all.”

“Yes, I am not selfish!” I complained tears still choking me.

“No, you are not.” she wiped the tears away with her soft fingers. She was old and I loved her accent from Bologna. That was the first time I understood how powerful words can be.

But, hurtful words kept coming my way and multiplied by the time I was attending middle school. However, by then I had learned how to take the blows. Sometimes I responded back, but other times I analysed them in a positive way.

And years later I accepted the word egoist when I was told once more that I am egoist. I am not saying that I accepted to be egoist, because I am not and being called that hurts. But I know the people who call me that are those who want to borrow something from me and then return them as damaged – hope I make sense.

I don’t mind being called egoist if I want to have the one I love all by myself. No, I am not selfish in the negative way of the word. I have come to the conclusion that people use words casually without considering the implications. I turn meaning of words around so that they don’t break me but only make me.

The hurtful words I endured in elementary throughout to high school have taught me not to use words casually, but weigh each one against the other before uttering them. Because I am aware how much words can make you or break you.

I promise to always use words that will empower Berry and siblings.

My wish for Berry is never to allow words to break his or her will. I wish Berry never uses hurtful words to break others will. That he or she can stop to think before speaking and others do the same back. But most importantly I pray Berry doesn’t experience the verbal abuses I endured whilst young.



  1. Beautifully written. I wish more people would examine how their words affect others. And, I agree with your teacher, you're NOT an egoist. Thank you for sharing yourself with us.

  2. I hope Berry is as strong and loving as you are.

  3. Wonderful post! It's great you are thinking about what values and moral you want Berry to possess! Conscientious parenting, i like that;-)

  4. People sometimes do not know that words can hurt or heal. Thanks for the post.

  5. if you are their mother they def. will have that quality! no doubt about it!


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