The title of this entry was inspired by It’s Fall link up and Donell Jones’ song
Who remembers that song? I think it was #1 in November ‘99. It reminds me of my very first trip to the USA. It was around this time of the year. Autumn or fall.
Late nineties was the period of my low, low rise jeans, so low I couldn’t even sit without a sweater around my waist. But I believe it was fashionable to show off your
thongs underpants. Anyone remember the Thong Song?
Anyways, I was listening to Donell’s song on songza and I felt like I was back in the past.
Autumn is my favourite season. Autumn, when the crunchy leaves fall, rolling down the deserted streets whilst children dance in them. Pure romanticism. Around this time of year life gets busy or was it just this week in my house?
No, life was busy as usual but added to that we were sleep deprived. AOI didn’t want to sleep throughout the night in her crib. She woke up around 3am crying for me and even when daddy was the first to hear her she would cry for me and wanted to come in our bed to cuddle me and fall back to sleep again. She would sleep straight away or sometimes she would ask me for the most random things. One night she asked for a book. I grabbed a book from my bedside table to give her but she kept on saying
“Not that book. I want that book.” Pointing at the ceiling.
Truth to be told, it was frustrating. I wanted her to be happy but I also wanted to sleep so much. I told her if she didn’t stop crying I was going to take her back to her crib. I feel so bad admitting this but sometimes it’s just too hard to be patient as a mother.
Another night she asked for her hairband. I found one to give to her. She played with it next to me as I tried to fall back to sleep. At one point the hairband fell off the bed and she started to protest. I couldn’t resist telling her the same thing as when she wanted the imaginary book. She decided to cuddle to me and fall asleep. She woke up around six thirty and seven. It felt like time never passed. I wanted to sleep more. Hubby woke up and took her downstairs. When she spoke, she was till my happy little girl telling me “Mummy, I’m going downstairs with daddy.” Guilt enveloped me but I really needed to have few seconds for my mind and body to get enough fresh blood circulating through.
Monday we didn’t go anyway. I had to catch up on something I don’t even remember anymore. AOI and I went for a walk and I decided to start looking for home day-care. I went to see one close by our house but she asked me to return the following day.
Tuesday Before heading to the French playgroup, which AOI lovingly calls Bonjour! we went to talk to the lady who has the day-care close to our house. She was lovely and the children looked alright but I didn’t feel attracted to it. Maybe I just couldn’t bring myself to settle for the first one. We went to the French playgroup and after that I drove around asking if there are space in other day-cares. I looked for both home and institutional day-cares, but non of them have space for a part-timer.
I really want two days a week for AOI to be able to get used to the idea that she can be away from mummy for some hours and I will always go back to pick her. Though I manage to get some writing done during AOI’s nap times, if she goes to a day-care I will have more time to fully dedicate to my writing.
In the evening I went to my French class and the teacher complimented me. I was so embarrassed and became so self-conscious about my pronunciation.
Wednesday We went to the library for another Bilingual French playgroup. During nap time C’s mom phoned and we had a motherhood talk. She pointed out that maybe AOI is teething with her molars. My shoulders relaxed. It felt liberating to voice out my frustration to another mother, and she told me it felt good to know that some changes that the changes in her daughter’s routine are not foreign to me.
I believe talking to other mothers about some issues that we may be experiencing lights up the journey of motherhood. After we whispered our goodbyes, to not wake up the girls, I saw a change in me. I was smiley, stressed and more accommodating.
After AOI’s nap and snack, we headed to the playground. We we enjoyed the autumn leaves. I love the crunchiness and AOI seems to like it too. She danced, kicked, pick and threw some leaves about.
Thursday We went to our local playgroup. After the playgroup C’s mom took some pictures of our girls. In the afternoon, after AOI and I both have rested, we danced to some Hip Hop music.
Friday Friday AOI and I went to R’s house for a playdate. We went to the playground. In the afternoon C’s mom suggested we go to the swimming pool but the girls naptime run into the public swimming pool hours. Now we are looking into some other hours.
In the evening, after dinner, AOI, daddy and I sat on the living room floor to have a cup of tea and biscuit whilst listening to jazz music, Miles Davis. I loved that family time together. I really hope we do that more often. I want to have some kind of tradition with my growing family.
Saturday morning we took AOI to the story time at the library. After that we took her home to have lunch and then nap. After nap we went to a small museum at the university. After that she rode her bicycle along the river trail.
Sunday It’s Thanksgiving weekend here in Canada so we all got together with some friends for a potluck. I’m getting the idea of what this autumn festivity means. Until we moved from England to Saskatchewan I didn’t know what Thanksgiving was. AOI and went to church alone because daddy was baking the sweet potatoes we were taking for the potluck at our friends’ house.
I give thanks for everything God’s sends our way, for the friends that we are making along the journey, for my family and for His mighty love.
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