31 Jan 2013

Mummy Style in This Cold Province

I mentioned in a previous post that I don’t feel confident in my new body, postpartum. The belly is not flat as it used to be, I have muffin tops all the time and wearing some of my old clothes is a challenge. Added to the mash is biting cold winter between –20/-30ºCelsius when were lucky.

When I have to go outside I can’t allow myself to be stylish as I would like.

If I show you what I normally wear, you might think I am homeless. I put everything I owe on this frumpy body of mine. While living in Europe I loved dressing well and took care of the accessories I put together. I think my fashion was boho-vintage-something.

mamastyle

boots: call it spring/ jeans: Levis San Francisco/ coat: vintage/ grandfather cardi: Hudson North @The Bay/ long sleeves tshirt: no name/ vest: no name/ scarf: DIY from an old sweater/ earrings: Old Navy/ spec: Bvlgari @David Clulow

I want to find my style again and one of my 2013 visions is to get my sense of style back. I am not going to be afraid to experiment with different items, get inspired along the way and embrace with both arms my new mummy body.

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30 Jan 2013

Life Purpose

keepcalmandwriteToday I am so excited to feature a post I read on Michelle’s blog at ememby.com. I found her blog last year through the limb difference community. I love her sense of humour and her passion for her family.

The post is about how her son, Jack, came to her one day and said “They didn’t want to play with me because of my hand.”

Those words said by Michelle’s son, Jack,  touched me so much because my daughter was born with a limb difference and I don’t know when  she will come to me and say something heart breaking like that. I don’t want to wait until then.

For this reason, though I never thought about becoming an advocate in spreading awareness about limb difference, I want to make my mission in raising awareness for people with differences: all kind of differences.

I prayed for God’s help in finding my purpose in life and I believe He wants me to be an advocate for people who need help to stand up for themselves: bullied children and children with a difference. I didn’t know how to do it but slowly the answer came to me this month. Through this blog, duh.

Yes, I can dedicate one post a month on this platform to help spread the awesomeness of being different. I can do my little to make people accept those they deem different. Being singled out because one is tall, short, curly, dark skinned, light skinned, one handed etc.

When I was in my teens, I was singled out because I am Ghanaian and Black. It sucks being teased all the time. I love my difference and I hope I will bring my daughter to accept her difference and hopefully in spreading awareness people will learn to accept everyone’s difference.

As Ryan at Living One Handed concisely describes in the cartoon his friend designeddifferent-is-awesome-small

{via}

without further ado following is the post by Michelle.

*****

Found Lacking? I don’t Think So: Guest Post by Michelle

I have been tossing this topic around in my head for the last couple weeks or so. Since Jack “graduated” from having to go back to the orthopaedic surgeon for any future check-ups, we really haven’t had any issues or incidents with his hand. Not to say I don’t notice when others stare at it – both children and adults and a natural reaction, one I have had myself – or that we haven’t talked with people about it (something I absolutely don’t mind doing because education and pride are the two things we can do to open other people’s minds about limb differences), but nothing out of the ordinary. But at some point in December, both Liam and Jack expressed a desire for Jack to have two big hands. Liam said it first and thankfully Jack did not overhear him saying it to me. And then we were in the checkout at the grocery store when Jack said it to me. It cuts right through my heart to hear either of them say something like that, but especially Jack because despite all the times we tell him he is special and that God made him that way and that his little hand is no different from how God made other people different, he has measured himself by the standards of others and found himself lacking, wanting more. It does not surprise me that those feelings are there, but it still breaks my heart.

Both occasions were random occurrences, we hadn’t been talking about Jack’s little hand or hadn’t witnessed Jack having difficulty doing something because of his little hand, they were just out of the blue comments like kids often make. In Liam’s case, I asked him why he thought that – he responded because most people had two big hands. And I matter-of-factually reiterated that God made Jack that way and that while it was true that most people had two big hands, there were plenty of people who had other differences that made them stand out like being very tall or very short, or having to wear glasses or hearing aids, or not having legs, etc.… And then I reminded him that Jack would be able to do almost anything with his two hands as they were, just like Jim Abbott who we had met during the summer. Oh yeah, he said, I guess I just wish it was different. I gently told him that I hoped he never said that to Jack because it might hurt his feelings.

In Jack’s case, I simply reminded him that God didn’t make him that way and that instead he chose to make him special with a lucky fin, or a lucky little hand. And then I told him that I love his little hand and that he is going to do anything he wants to in life. And then I smiled broadly at him and at the man behind us in line who was intently listening to our conversation because I will not miss the opportunity to make sure Jack knows that I think he is awesome and to make sure that other people know as well. But, goodness, it’s not easy navigating these waters.

And then yesterday, on the way home from daycare, Jack was doing his usual routine of how no one plays with him at daycare… which, for the record, he says all the time and his teachers assure me that he is the ringleader of their activities – something I have witnessed myself when he doesn’t know I am watching – but I still feel myself getting all mama bear in those moments, thinking of the possibility of those other four-year-olds hurting my kid’s feelings. But this time, he said, “They didn’t want to play with me because of my hand.” Gulp. Who knows if this true, or a perception that Jack has, or just something he has made up because he knows it will get a reaction out of me. Whatever the reason, I think there is something I need to do here, but I am not sure what. What would you do if you were in my shoes? A letter to the other parents explaining Jack’s limb difference and giving them some talking points for their own kids to help educate them about how it is not anything wrong with him or a reason to not be his friend? Suggest a class viewing of Finding Nemo and prompt the teachers to talk about how Nemo didn’t let his smaller fin hold him back and that he helped make him awesome, just like Jack? At the very least, I’ll be talking to his teachers and getting their thoughts/observations. But this is just the tip of proverbial iceberg, as these occurrences will happen more often as he grows up and is in school full time, and he will become more aware of his difference and the attention it draws from other people.

So do me a favor, if you are a parent, please talk to your kids about differences in people and how they should react to and treat someone with a difference, which is: NO DIFFERENT THAN HOW THEY WOULD TREAT ANYONE ELSE. Explain to them that all people are different in one way or another. Prompt them to think about how they would feel if someone didn’t want to be their friend because they have curly hair or freckles, or perhaps were missing part of their hand. Reiterate that some differences can be a challenge for the person, but that the possibilities are limitless. Look up videos and articles on the Internet about people who have limb differences so your kids can see how awesome they are: Tony Memmel, Jim Abbott, Nick Newell, Kevin Laue, Kevin Connolly, Oscar Pistorius, are just a few. And if your kids (or you) have questions about Jack’s hand, ask them, because it’s natural to be curious and we don’t mind. Plus I want to make sure that Jack grows up talking about his hand and not hiding it his sleeve or ever being ashamed of it. I never want him to find himself lacking, but instead to be assured that God has given him more than enough to succeed in life.

29 Jan 2013

Like A Queen

Some of you know that last summer we were looking forward to buying a house. Unfortunately it fell through because we are still waiting for our Canadian residency and we couldn’t raise the full deposit requested for non residents.


Anyways, finding the right house was a big task but in the end we found something that we both loved and, after the vendors dropped the price, we could afford.


In the process we listed what we wanted from the potential house

futurehouseI want to find a place that has a lovely bathroom. Though it's the room of the house I’ll spend less time in, I want a spacious and bright bathroom. A bathroom that has all the facilities as the flat my family once rented in Italy had. We had a bidet, old school but still a bidet.

Having a bidet in your bathroom is normal in Italy. Also, whilst travelling through Singapore and Malaysia, I noticed that most hotels have it. Those hotels which didn’t have it had a tap with a small hose attached for after you finish your business.

I recently saw this toilet seat bidet and I want one in our future bathroom.

Why do I want one? It is so fancy and unlike an old bidet, which I still had to clean and wash my hands, it would cut cost for paper and washing my hands after going to the washroom.

Plus, since watching Coming to America, I’ve always wondered how do queens and kings clean themselves after they go to the washroom, now my curiosity is answered. So, in my future ideal bathroom, I want to feel like a queen after I use the washroom.

28 Jan 2013

Week 4: Saskatchewan Winter Made Me A Real Canadian

G’day everyone. How was your 4th week of 2013?

My week was busy and I can’t even put my finger on what caused that busyness. Maybe I thought this week was week 5 of 2013.

I’ve been thinking that maybe AOI will grow to think that her mother doesn’t do anything but sits in front of her laptop most hours of the day. With this thought in mind I decided to not use my laptop on Monday. Instead we read books. It was hard because being a writer/blogger I have to write or at least read what is going on the social media circle.

I phoned my sister in law for a good long chat. Whilst talking, my SIL said something I was agreeing with and in Ghanaian I responded “Haane” meaning “yes”, it a repetitive so AOI started to say the same word while smiling at me. She makes me laugh that little girl of mine. 

Our favourite picture book of the day was Why I Love Canada. whyilovecanada

No French playgroup for us on Tuesday. I was so justified by the weather. It was –30 degrees outside. In the evening we had to meet hubby and some of his colleagues for sushi. I couldn’t find my house/car keys anywhere in my handbag/diaper bag. When AOI went for her afternoon nap, I went up and down the house in search of the keys which I haven’t seen since Saturday. I looked and looked without luck. I came downstairs and something told me to look outside the front door.

Guess what I found?

The keys in the front key hole. Being in cold since Saturday is not fun, but what a good neighbourhood we live in.

Wednesday I was tempted, Tempted to stay indoors because outside was –25 degrees, instead I dressed up AOI in all her winter gear and made our way to the swimming pool. When we got there she was fast asleep, but that didn’t stop me from going on with my plan. Once inside the building the receptionist told us that due for low numbers of life guards the swimming pool was closed to new arrivals. I was so annoyed but happy because I didn’t let my fear for the weather stop me.

AOI had a good nap. I used those hours to edit two chapters of my novel. I am getting excited about it and can’t wait to share it with the world – if they would like to read it. a different perspective

I went to bed around 23:30.

I woke up the following morning at 8:30 – that was 9 long hours sleep. I went to bed at 23:30. When I woke up I couldn’t believe I’ve slept all those hours. My body was numb from too much sleep. That's the longest I've slept since becoming mummy. It was a breakthrough. Both hubby and I hoped it was going to be the first of many good night sleep. That didn’t last, by Friday we were back to six or seven hours sleep, if we go to bed early.

Well, Thursday morning, after all the lazing around, we left late for the indoor playgroup. By the time we got there I was sweating so much, I felt sorry for myself. Getting AOI put her snowsuit on is a battle. She kicks and screams, meanwhile I sweat because I wear my jacket before her. I really wonder how mothers of two or more children do get out of the house.

In the afternoon I decided go take some pictures as an excuse for a ten minutes doze of fresh air. After the battle of dressing up AOI I turned to crab the camera, the next thing I hear is AOI crying. She fell and hit her cheek on the dinning chair. Now she has a bruise on the cheek, another badge of babyhood.AOIbruise

How did older parents managed to bring us up babies into adulthood, did we fall and scratch or bruise our faces? Did we cut our lips? I think God is such a great protector of us all, especially children

Friday was welcomed with joy because we went for lunch with hubby at his ‘posh’ work restaurant. It's a nice place for brunch and happy hour meals :). We were met with his colleague, the one whose child has leukaemia. They are in Toronto for the treatments and little RN is doing well. His daddy was here for a week worth of work meetings and friendship meet-ups (we went to the sushi restaurant thanks to his arrival in city). Can’t wait to have them all back in the city. His wife is pregnant with their second child, due in March.

As I mentioned earlier, the good night sleep ended on Saturday. The night before AOI picked at her dinner. She wanted the peas and some other veggies but wouldn’t eat her abc pasta. Throughout the night she was asking for “Latte, latte”, in the end I had to give her free access to the boob.

sasky

Team work is great because after we had our long Saturday breakfast and shower, we all went out of the house before midday. First stop was the farmers market because I was convinced there was a winter festival in town. It did start today but they are still working on some features.wintersaskywintersasky2

Next stop was a free writer's conference in the city. It was a small event but well organised. I felt good being among like minded people. One essay/presentation inspired me to write better. The writer said that her writing is simply grasping straws of words overhead around in her every day life and weaving them into something plausible. Another writer commented that, though he was born and raised in Vancouver, he has never felt Canadian until this weekend thanks to Saskatchewan winter.

On this note, I would like to ask my Canadian families to come experience Saskatchewan winter if they want to be real Canadians, not because the passport say so but because they felt Saskatchewan winter cold in the bones.

For dinner we were invited to some friend's house. I was detoxing but the roast beef made me sabotage my detoxing plan. I will restart tomorrow.

Another bad sleep for AOI. Just before I went to sleep last night I went into her room to double check if her temperature is right. She woke up and never slept well. All she wanted, throughout the night, was this "latte, latte". For this reason we skipped church. We were tired from yesterday's activities, and the lack of good sleep.

the photo below is part of the paintthemoon 2013 photo project
adifferentperspectivequestions: When you are going out with your child/children, how do you manage get out of the house in time and without sweat? When did your child/children started sleeping through the night?

Have a great week 5 Smile

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Group Giveaway: 6 Bloggers 6 Winners

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25 Jan 2013

Friday’s Letters #3: Why You Love Motherhood

Photobucket

Dear Older Self

when you will read this letter, you will be old, and maybe you may be questioning the reason you’re mother. This letter is here to remind you that you love motherhood for the little moments that you want to capture but it is impossible to freeze them all. This entry to remind of the time you managed to capture one of those precious moments.In that moment that you wanted desperately to freeze time to keep hold onto the fast growth of your first born.

15-01-2013

This particular morning, after what seemed like the longest hour you managed to sooth AOI back to sleep. The main problem was that the lazy mum wanted to bypass her daughter's needs of dry tush, mmm bad mummasitter.

After you changed her and she had had enough 'latte' {she says milk in Italian, so cute of her, maybe she is not keen in Italian any more of maybe she loves that language so much that she wants to live in Milan, Bologna or Rome}, she curled her tiny body into your arms. You kissed her red warm cheeks. She let out a smiley sigh. You felt blessed. You counted your blessings of having her in your lives {husband and you}.

As your baby slept you thought about the many reasons you would like to freeze time. You wanted to bottle up her milky baby smell, her sweet Botticelli drawn eye lashers and eye brows, her peach rosebud lips, her little button nose, her soft fingers and sweet little palm, her morning giggles.

You observed her beautiful brown curls, her chest raising up and down in a sweet dream, you wanted to freeze the moment also for her agile pint size body, her sparkling big brown eyes when they look at you as if you're the only luckiest human being on earth, her giggles as you tickle her tummy, her wiggly toes as they dance around the house. You thought This is it, the magic I want to hold onto. You slid out of bed, tiptoed downstairs to crab your camera to freeze this exact moment

dream

When you baby sleep is pure bliss, and your heart melts.

Love and hugs from your 30+years old self

xoxo T.

p.s: i'm also here

Photobucket

24 Jan 2013

Introducing: #ProjectMilf

Hello ladies,
 
Two weeks ago, we posted two words on a pink background, #ProjectMilf
Then last week, we asked if you were Milf ready? 
 
Now let us tell you more about the details of how you too can become a MILF!!!
We came up with this project because of our own personal experiences.
We've made our New Year' Resolution and are ready to tackle it...
and then February rolls around and can't even remember what the resolutions were.
It's definitely one for the researchers and analysts, of New Year's Resolutions,
figuring out "why can't people keep their resolutions?" 
 
But we
Mrs. Pancakes of mr-mrspancakes.blogspot.com)
believe we have the answer to the question. 
We honestly believe the one thing missing in our desire to keep our resolutions is: "Accountability."
Webster's dictionary describes "Accountability" as: the quality
or state of being accountable, especially an obligation
or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one's actions.
“To account for one's actions" is what stands out for us
because it's related to the purpose of #ProjectMilf.
 
When you first hear the word, Milf,
many adjectives come to mind including 'sexy-confident-powerful' etc,
just like the mom portrayed in the popular movie.
The mom every guy wanted and us women wanted to be. 
And you are right to think about that mom but there is more to Milf than that.  
 
The word Milf in the #ProjectMilf is an acronym for
Motivating & Inspiring Leading Female.
This is the woman who is "sexy-confident-powerful"
that takes charge of her life and makes things happen.
In our daily lives, we can all be the leading female who is motivating & inspiring 
but sometimes we need to hear encouraging words,
cheers and high fives to make that extra push.
 
The Project of MotivatingInspiringLeadingFemale
is intended to be a social community
that will help us "to account for" our actions.
  #ProjectMilf is for any woman who wants to get their
sexy, confidence, power, energy, shine & joy back.
  It's for anyone who wants to challenge themselves in 2013
to commit to a goal, be accountable to yourself,
the community and meet your goal in order to Milf life.
 
To join #ProjectMilf, you will need to:
1. Choose your goal: health, social, financial, personal, professional
(whatever goal that is going to help you feel sexy, confident, powerful & shine)
2. Commit to the full 2013
3. Commit to Weekly Challenges (to motivate and encourage you reach your goals)
4. Commit to Weekly (Thursday) Check-In (link ups)
5. Support/Encourage #ProjectMilf members on social media
6. Local Meet-Ups (to engage in #ProjectMilf activities)
#ProjectMilf is a work in progress so we are open to suggestions and ideas. 
We hope you will join the MotivatingInspiringLeadingFemale
community because the world needs more Milfs.
Don't you agree?
 
TOI, Mrs. Tabbs & Mrs P. have already committed to #ProjectMilf....
will you be next?
[projectmilf%255B2%255D.jpg]

23 Jan 2013

Capelli - Hair

dear ladies, thanks for your lovely comments on the big chop post. i read each comment with my heart in my throat because I am happy to know that you all are supportive of my natural short hair journey.
 
today I want to share a song that I danced to back in the 90s, Capelli (Hair). 
 
It’s one of my favourite Italian songs. The music is soft soul and the lyric is written to glorify the wonderful but difficult hair of the singer. He expresses the despair that it would cause him if he didn't have his HAIR.

In a verse he sings Non voglio più chiedere scusa se sulla testa porto questa specie di medusa o foresta (I do not want to apologize, if on this head I carry some kind of  jellyfish or forest)...

I just love it!
 
It's a powerful song and it a cry of protest against the mass media which point the finger if your hair is not seen as normal. Growing up I stressed my hair too much... hot air, retouching creams and oily pomades to keep it soft... deciding to go natural was the best decision I have made for my beauty regime. I know the majority prefer me al natural.
 
Enjoy the music, ciao, miao, maramao Winking smile!

Fabi Niccoló - Capelli
Io senza capelli
sono una pagina senza quadretti
un profumo senza bottiglia
una porta chiusa senza la maniglia
biglia senza pista
un pescatore sprovvisto della sua migliore esca
don Giovanni senza una tresca
io senza te uno scettro senza re


Non voglio più chiedere scusa
se sulla testa porto questa specie di medusa o foresta
non è soltanto un segno di protesta
ma è un rifugio per gli insetti un nido per gli uccelli
che si amano tranquilli fra i miei pensieri
e il cielo sono la parte di me che mi somiglia di più

Vivo sempre insieme ai miei capelli.
Non sono venuto in motocicletta
non mi sono pettinato con le bombe a mano
non ho messo le dita dentro la spina
non mi sono lavato con la candeggina
sono uno di quelli che porta i suoi lunghi capelli per scelta
e non usa trucchi e voi levatevi la parrucca

Io vivo sempre insieme ai miei capelli nel mondo
Tu senza gioielli sei una pagina senza quadretti
un profumo senza bottiglia
una porta chiusa senza maniglia
biglia senza pista
un pescatore sprovvisto della sua migliore esca
don Giovanni senza una tresca
tu senza me uno scettro senza re

Vivi sempre insieme ai tuoi gioielli
Io vivo sempre insieme ai miei capelli nel mondo
Ma quando perdo il senso e non mi sento niente
io chiedo ai miei capelli di darmi la conferma
che esisto e rappresento qualcosa
per gli altri di unico vivo, vero e sincero
malgrado questa pietosa impennata di orgoglio
io tento ogni giorno che vivo
di essere un uomo e non un cespuglio

 

rough translation

I, without hair
I’m like a page not squared
a perfume without bottle
a closed door without the handle
a ball without track, a fisherman without his best bait
Don Giovanni without an affair
I without you, a king without a sceptre

I do not want to apologize
if on this head I carry some kind of  jellyfish or forest
is not only a sign of protest
but it is a haven for insects, nest for birds
who love quietly between my thoughts
and the heavens are the part that looks more like me

I always live with my hair.
I did not come on a motorcycle
I haven’t combed with hand grenades
I did not put the fingers in the plug
I have not washed with bleach
I am one of those who carry their long hair by choice
and does not use tricks and you take off your wig

I always live with my hair in the world
You without jewellery you are like a page not squared
a perfume without bottle
a closed door without the handle
a ball without track, a fisherman without his best bait
Don Giovanni without an affair
I without you, a king without a sceptre

You always live together with your jewellery
I always live with my hair in the world
But when I lose my way and I feel like nothing
I ask my hair to give me confirmation
that I exist and I represent something
for others unique, alive, true and sincere
Despite this pitiful surge of pride
I try every day I live
to be a man and not a bush

21 Jan 2013

Week 3

Good Monday Everyone.

How was your week 3 of 2013?

I must confess that every day I wake, I don’t recall with clarity what I did the previous day. My present past is becoming slippery at the tick of the clock while my remote past is sharper like crystal. For this reason, though a recount of my week on a weekly basis can be heavy and boring for some, I am glad I take the time to write little details that made my week happy. I want to be able to come back to this little online space of mine to reread how my days were when my memories will be too grey to recall anything.

These are little actions that formed our week. scones

Mondays are for weaning ourselves into the week. We didn’t do much during the day. Our (AOI and I) favourite things to do on the day were reading Grumpy Bird or Rabbit’s Nap, watching Sesame Street and cuddling. In between all these activities we had lunch, changed diapers, took pictures of a smiley little girl, wrote blog posts and edited some lines of the novel. We listened to Songza (Beautiful Lullabies), my favourite song on the playlist is Don’t Panic by Coldplay

 Don't Panic by Coldplay on Grooveshark

We danced bare feet in our dining room. When Quelqu’un M’a Dit by Carla Bruni comes up AOI looks at me and smiles happy. She then sways to the music and move her head side to side raptured by the melancholic tune. I used to listen to Bruni’s music when I was young in Italy but I wasn’t a great fun, but her songs in French and English are sweet to listen to.

My busy week starts at five thirty each Mondays, when I have to go tutor the little boy who is learning Italian. Last week we focused on Days of The Week and Family Members. I love tutoring and would love to have another student but for now I life to focus on just one person. I try to incorporate games with the learning and he loves that. He become alert as soon as I say let play a game trying to use the Italian words he knows, mainly colours and numbers.

Tuesday the usual dilemma presents itself, to go or not to go out. We were running late for our first day return to French Yoga and Familie group. The more AOI grows the harder it gets to get out of the house in time if we are alone. She takes everything as a game of dodge-mummy-catch-baby. She normally looks at me, then run away and obviously I run after her. I believe I will lose weight with her as my trainer.

Where was I?

Yes, we were running late yet another Tuesday for a playgroup. We left the house 15 minute into the start of program but I thought well, if we get there and we can’t attend at least I can return these books and toys we borrowed. When we got there, thirty minute late, there were just two mothers and their four children combine and the program hadn’t start yet. AOI had fun and saw other children, and she danced. She was such a darling..

AOI made history. On Wednesday she slept more than eights hours and followed the record for three nights in a roll. The first morning when I woke up at seven, and realised that I didn’t wake up in the night to feed her or change her diaper, I was taken aback. I was so proud of her and when I heard her morning cry/call I went run into her room and showered her with butterfly kisses.

We went swimming after six months hiatus. AOI was shivering when we entered the water, I felt so sorry for her. Still she wanted to be in the water so I walked and twirled her around for about forty minutes. Before leaving we went into the hot tub, she enjoyed that. In the evening it was bittersweet to witness how AOI is growing so fast. When we leave the house she simply says “bye-bye” as if in saying “Okay, just go would you? I am busy eating or reading a picture book or Elmo or Ernie are more fun that you.” I can’t believe my tiny baby is turning really into a toddler. She is also becoming so mischievous, her favourite mischief is putting pieces of toilet roll into the WC.AOIelmo

Saturday and Sunday we had the most hilarious adventures with our car.

Saturday, it got stuck in the snow in our parking lot. We had to be creative – my creativity initially – by digging the wheels out out of the snow. Then on Sunday, on our way to church we couldn’t close the driver’s door because it was frozen. Once we managed to close the car we had to use the passenger’s door to get into the driver’s seat. It was a funny and comical situation da film.

To conclude the week we went to one of my writer’s friends to have a lovely Indian meal.

Have a great week 4 Smile

17 Jan 2013

Be Inspired: Never Give Up

I really don’t know how to explain it… but there is no need to explain. I just know and feel and believe more than ever that God is working through me. Maybe today you need a bit of encouragement or an inspiration.

16 Jan 2013

The Big Chop

I finally I went for it. I chopped all my locs off.bigchop1

Growing my natural locs taught me one great wisdom in life: patience. I was impatience for so long and before embarking on motherhood I chose to grow my locs. Initially I was intimidated by going natural and having short hair. Sometimes I wondered why I was going all the way (locking my hair), but in the end I was patient and my hair grew beautifully. It was good to learn that because getting to my daughter I had to employ that patience.

But before the beginning of 2013 I felt the time was ripe to be fearless and cut all my hair off – I trimmed it back in September 2012.

This year I want a clean fresh start and the only way I was able to put the foot in the right direction was letting go all my locs. I loved my long locs. It was my pride because it took me three years to achieve the shoulder length hair.P9195946 bigchop2Having short natural hair can be intimidating yet it’s liberating because it makes you realise that it’s just hair and it will grow back again. bigchop03

boots: hunter| trousers: atmosphere| cardigan: moth @anthropologie uk|bodies: intimissimi| spex: paul smith

question: Have you ever cut your hair short? How did that make you feel?

Please share with me, I like to hear from everyone that stops by Smile

xoxo, TOI

p.s: I have a post about fashion inspiration on TC30s, please check it out

14 Jan 2013

Week 2

Good Monday my lovelies.

This week was awesome. I loved and enjoyed every bit of it. Yes, even the spitting –20/30 degrees Celsius.toihavingfun

Last Monday was uneventful, just few chores that needn’t be recorded.

Tuesday, I had the good intentions to go to a playgroup at the library but I was running behind so we just went to the library to read some books. We stayed for more than one hour. Towards the end AOI brought a book and I was reading to her when, without me noticing in time, she reaped a page. I managed to save it from total destruction. I was so embarrassed when I took it back to the librarian and tell them of the misfortune.

Wednesday he took us for a Thai. He gave more that 25% tip. This week was an awesome with my family. Hubby was feeling guilty for neglecting us for his work, I understood that he had to work and didn’t rompi (nagged him) but he still felt like he was focusing too much on work. He is such a darling.all lined up

Thursday was the usual playgroup. It was a good session because AOI is getting the idea of what do whilst there. She is interacting more with the kids and the other children love her. They are two sisters that love hugging her and being nice to her – well, sometimes the little sister is a little rough with her – but all in all, the children interact ‘civilly’ with one another.

Friday was another quiet day, however in the evening we went for a walk in the gallery at hubby’s work.

Saturday, late morning, I went to hubby’s work free gym for a run on the treadmill. It was a good session, which went lost as soon I got out from there. Hubby was looking after AOI, so when I got back into the car he asked what I wanted for lunch. A sensible person would have opted for something healthy. Well not me. We went to a local burger restaurant. And I had 1/3 Bacon & Cheddar burger, basket of fries to share and a milkshake.

Saturday evening I felt the greatness of God wrapping his mantel around my shoulders and comforting me. I was browsing some blogs and after I found Lauren Casper’s I just felt like, wow, God is working here. I didn’t read anything about her or that she’s a ministry wife until later. But at the first click, I just felt His voice, speaking to me, telling me to open my heart to his mysterious way of working. The song God Will Make A Way just jumped in my mind and I wanted to praise the Almighty so much.

God Will Make A Way by Don Moen on Grooveshark

I listened to Don Moen beautiful Christian songs while AOI was sleeping and hubby was busy on the computer – he took a well deserved break from his family duties, well he bathed and put our daughter to bed.

Anyways, the words of the song spoke to me so much. I thought about AMSAA.I thought about my path in life and I give everything in God’s hands. I want to surround to his Might, “I know he will make a way and be my guide”. For as long as I can remember I want to help in some way. I would like to do a fundraising to help families of children that might be in financial difficulties in Ghana and can’t afford taking their babies to the hospital. Though AMSAA, our angel is not on this earth with us, in her honour and with the Mighty guide of God, I want be able to save at least one child in my life time!

After writing the above I wondered which sermon is the priest going to give on Sunday. cookies

Sunday came and I was more glad to be at church than ever before. I don’t have words to describe how each word that came out of the preacher’s mouth spoke to me. This the Prayer of Approach

O Creator, you have set everything in motion. There are galaxies, stars, and planets, circling and whirling and winding through the cosmos. The animals on this planet, the great and small creatures of the sea, the birds of the air, the insects above, on, and below the earth, are in motion, seeking the destiny you have planted in their hearts. In great migrations and small journeys, all things seen and unseen are part of your great dance. May we through this time of worship see more clearly our place in it all. May we see, more clearly, how it all come together in this time of gathering. You are present and we arrive; you are leading and at last we allow ourselves to be led; you are the creator and we are the created. We thank you for your presence, now and always, in Jesus name. Amen.

Then sermon hit the nail on the again and again.

At this point I have to confess that, though the preacher is very eloquent and easy to follow, sometimes I feel sleepy during sermon but not today. I was so alert that I had to send some tweets out to remind myself the importance of his words. The sermon was about Crossing the Divide and the message that stood out to was how we shouldn’t be scared to accept God’s epiphany in our everyday life. God doesn’t choose to move us in a particular moment of our lives. Everyday is a day God can choose to move our lives. Like Rose Parker chose to cross the divide that set two races apart to live her full self in the world so we can.

I pray for my sister in law, my brother, I ask the Almighty to strengthen them both, to guide them, because they are going through so much pain and I can’t do anything put put them – especially my SIL – in God’s capable hands!

*****

This picture makes me smile, I couldn’t pull off a pretty face as others do while jumping.toihavingfun

have a fun week.

xoxo, T.

p.s: the first two photos are taking part in the Paint the Moon {This Our Life} and Let’s Do 52 Photo Project

This Is Our Life - A 52 Week Lifestyle Photo Project by Paint the Moon Photoshop Actions52 Week Project Photo Paint the Moon Photoshop Actions PSE

11 Jan 2013

Friday's Letters #2: The Body Issue

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Dear Self, No, no don’t think what you are thinking. You are not fat. The Wii Fit doesn’t know the difference between muscles and fat. Though it said you are obese, you are NOT OBESE. You got a new body which needs caring and dedication. When you put these two things into priority, you will see result in no time. This body will boost the confidence you are searching for. successquotesThis week you went to Old Navy to buy a swimwear for AOI but when you didn’t find anything you decided to try on few things for yourself… You couldn’t turn your head to face the woman starring back at you in the mirror. You were worried the person in the mirror was a false perspective. You didn’t want to listen to that old little voice, which once pushed you to your limit. Your new size makes you believe you are always frumpy, not confident and tells you to embark on a diet. You hate the word diet, because per experience it can do so much harm to a person. You don’t aspire becoming skinny, NO that aim is evil in your vocabulary; you want to feel good in your new body. Be fit YES, but be able to feel confident in any size. You want to find your lost sense of fashion. When you started this journey of motherhood you aimed at getting fit before, during and after baby. The first two points went according to the plan. In fact soon after baby you could fit your old pre-baby clothes. mummyfashionBut then, no workouts, upgrading your meals from one to two potions pushed you off the healthy living wagon… that’s not good. It’s time to think about your long term goal… Healthy heart for life! Because you have to remember, a whole panettone is easy to eat, but getting it off your thighs it feels like unwanted visitors in your house – no matter how hard you try they are here to reign. You once managed to become fit without compromising your health so, we both know you can do it. beforeafterworkout-horzYes, you can do it my dear self, you can do it if put your *** into it! Remember how you got there? 3 hours, only three hours a week. Though you used to say “University is your baby” you still made time for your body and mind. 3 hours, one on Monday, one on Wednesday and one on Saturday will keep your heart healthy, your body fit and your feelings happy!

Dear Readers, say hello, write something, don’t be shy. I will stop by to say hello or ciao!

xoxo T.

p.s: i'm also here

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10 Jan 2013

Are You Milf Ready?

projectmilf

  1. Have you ever wondered how does Halle Berry, Mel B., Jennifer Lopez keep their figure?
  2. Do you want to turn your own head?
  3. Do you want to be happier than a year ago?
  4. Do you want to be accountable?
  5. Do you want to be part of a group of like minded people?
  6. Do you want to feel confident in your life (at any age)?
  7. Do you want to motivate, inspire other leading females?

If you answered YES to most questions then you are Milf ready. Please sign up to the project by leaving a comment in the comment box with your email for more information.

8 Jan 2013

AOI’s Nursery Reveal

nurseryfinalmente this nursery.

I’m excited to show it. I’d like to believe that it took this long to complete the decoration due to moving houses last summer, but it’s not the truth. The real reason behind this long delay is how sometimes I feel overwhelmed by internet browsing.

I am glad we moved house, this new place is flooded with natural light; even in the winter we don’t need the light on until late evening.nurseryentrynursery1nursery10nursery11As you see this room in the pictures above it’s not exactly the same as you read this entry. It’s a room in continuous evolution, just as my baby. She moves so fast and with her a toy here, a book there, change of linen and all clothes on the floor makes this place a whole lot of lovely childish mess. I managed to put this post together to remind myself of the good work I did and can do between AOI’s naps.

I wanted a gender neutral theme, also I wanted to use some Winnie the Pooh models my sister in law bought about 12 years ago for her son’s nursery. sleepypoohpoohmodelsI got hold of them more than three years ago when she was giving them away. I brought them all the way from Britain for this occasion. Now, it’s a family loom.

details around the roomdetailsdetails4AOIsbookteddybears-horzthrowsdetails3-horzdetails1-horzI am grateful for the many loving people I count in our lives.  

To decorate AOI’s nursery family and many friends sent us lovely and thoughtful items. My crafty sister in law, who lives in Scotland, made the bunting with AOI’s name and date of birth. My mother in law made the bunny and bought her the black doll. She also spend nights and days to paint and write a book full of songs and rhymes for AOI. This is something she will treasure for a life time.

A church member made the pink eyes stuffed elephants, my mother in law made the other with black eyes long time ago. Once it was done, she didn’t like it but I wanted it for my future children so I saved it from the bin. The cream big teddy bear is from a church member. The little brown teddy bear is my fifteen years old bear. Being historian at heart I kept it because I want items that will become family loom.

The crib is second hand Storkcraft bought on kijiji. I gave it a coat of fresh paint and it’s near to new. The fun quilt with the initial A is handmade by a dear friends of ours. My mum passed down the bright red Ghanaian cloth to AOI and I gave her the cream-orange-sea blue one which belonged to me. The chair is handmade by another dear friend of ours. The safari and winnie sheets are 100% cotton from Wal-Mart.

The dresser/changing station is vintage bought on kijiji. I removed all the old vinyl coating and primed and painted with white paint. I’m proud how it turned out. To make it functional as changing station I added a removable changing pad I bought from Wal-Mart.

The bookcase and storage baskets are Marta Stewart set from Home Depot.

My heart swell when I see the AOI’s initials in the the words LAUGH, LOVE, LIVE. Those are the words I want to my daughter live by. I painted everything in bright yellow for a little bit of sunshine in the room.  AOInap

When I walk into the nursery, as my daughter is dreaming, I feel blessed to be living here. Sometimes I miss life and our flat in London, but being in Canada has given me space to play with and decorating a loving room for our daughter is one of those.

Have a great evening and rest of the week my dears!

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