31 Mar 2016

INTERVIEW




1. Why did you choose to write about Susanna?

This is a great question. I wanted to write about a girl I never met in the many books I read as a teenager growing up in Italy. There were girls with curly hair but they were white and I also wanted to explore the multiculturalism in today Italy, a topic I haven't had the pleasure to read enough about. Being a black woman I could have shied away from writing about a mixed race girl but my daughter is mixed raced and I wanted to imagine how she could feel when people are trying to box her in a world that sees a lot in black and white and not the many grey areas in a race.



2. Where is your favourite place to write?

We recently moved house so I'm learning which area in the new place makes my creativity flow. However in my old house I had one room all for myself to use as my office, so I called it my sanctuary. It was a bliss to close the door on the noise when my husband was home with the kids. With two little kids under five finding a special place to write is a bonus. My current house is small so I may end up making a sanctuary in the garden or garage.



Read my full interview with By J. E. Hunter here

23 Mar 2016

ON RACE: DOES COLOUR DEFINE PEOPLE?

{#getintheframe and forget about perfection, the kids will remember you not the bad hair days}


So, I don't think colour shouldn't define people.

I am proud to be Black African but at the same time I am proud to say that I love the diverse culture I've experienced. This has always being the case since as long as I can remember.

Before I moved to Italy, I never thought in colours. The most important thing that mattered to me was my name. And how people teased me because they thought I was too skinny. They called me one, because they said my face looked like the number - well, I don't look number 1 anymore!

They also laughed at my out of the ordinary name, but no-body teased me based on my skin colour - I guess it was because we were all the same skin tone. How dark I was never bothered anyone at that stage in my life.

Once in Italy at elementary school my friends never teased me based on my skin colour, in fact no-one teased me, apart from one guy saying to me "You are egoist...!" I didn't know the meaning of the word, but I cried so much my head hurt because something told me it wasn’t a nice word.

Then middle school rolled in, the first year was carefree. I made new nice friends with whom we laughed about silly jokes we wrote on our school books. Then life changed from the second year. The last two years at middle school scared and scarred me. I lost most of my confidence and went through a hard time. Some will say those were the hardcore teenage years, but I say it was just two years of bullies.

They were three or four guys in my class who teased me. They teased me because my skin is dark brown. They also teased another girl because she is tall and clever. I stood up for myself and sometimes for the other girl. I never hid my identity and always knew who I was and what I stand for. I was proud to be brown and I am proud to be brown. But they called me nasty names. I told myself that I was strong and nobody was going to break me down. I told myself which part of me I love most. I told myself that I am BROWN  and BEAUTIFUL.

But somehow their mean comments triggered something in me. I started to worry about my appearance. At the time of career choice I opted for flashes and television. I wanted to become a model. I didn’t want to go back to school for more teasing. I wanted to show those guys that I am beautiful and successful. I wanted to be known. This pushed me to go to modelling and acting classes, but I missed going to school. So in February 2001, after four years out of education, I enrolled to study optics. However, my passion for writing made me study English Literature and History at university. But my passion to promote love for one identity and to embrace different colour is still strong in my soul. I don't want to sound like preaching, but I am happy to be able to use that experience for my stories.

My writings is centered around Brown, mixed race and multicultural people living in Italy/Europe. The struggles they have to face on daily basis and how they over come them. The search to be seen first and foremost humans. I write about the love I have for Africa and the love I have to my second home Europe. I write to embrace the multicultural life of African-Europeans.

My life experience has influenced my writing and my thinking. I am not colour blind, but I don't believe in pushing people into one box. I believe in humans with many cultures at their disposition. So, no colour doesn't define people. Life experiences define who you're.

Do you have any experience you would like to share with me? Have you ever lived in a predominated White area and you've been teased before.

Please leave a comment and don't forget to stop by my INSTAGRAM account
to keep the conversation going on.

16 Mar 2016

ON RACE


I remember that before AMI decided to accept his job offer in Canada he made some inquiries.

He knew a guy from Canada and he asked him if the people in the place are welcoming towards mix couples. This guy responded that Canadians are generally very friendly and we won't find it difficult to fit in.

I moved to Italy when I was little and until then I did not know I was black. I knew some people were people but I never thought about race as in black and white  until my move to Italy.

Also I never questioned what other people thought about me dating a white man until I moved to London and some people started to ask me what my family thought about me dating a white man. My family never questioned his race but more his honesty. But people asking questions like "what your mother said when you took a white man home?..." make me wonder if they look at us and ask themselves what we are together for. I consider my Hubby to be first and foremost my man and my love and I did not thought about his race (does that make me a bad person). I was in love and never felt in love due to his race...

I could go on and on, but yes thinking about my children make me question if the world will still be so race obsessed when they are old, my dreamy  heart says things will be better (something that the same heart told me 18 year ago before I met my husband and felt in love). I will teach them to love and cherish people not based on colour but based on their good heart.




7/52




TOI: My little artist
AOI: Taking care of her elephant is her pleasure
AOI + TOI: He loves his sister so much

15 Mar 2016

LATELY



I'm taking it easy on the blog because my body demands it.
I do my work and then it already time to go to bed or workout.
Little TOI is so energetic and likes to play rough - wrestling me every chance he gets.
I go to bed early when I can and the result is that
I'm up early and my brain seems to be working with some kind of normality.
I'm using a Mac computer and it seems like I have to learn everything from scratch so my blogging has also slow down.
I miss the old way of blogging and it seems like most of the people I started blogging have moved on or are not updating their lives as before.
I have to find time to write, but I've worked out a plan that I'm using to be able to balance everything as a woman, mother, freelancer and wife.

Let's see ow that turns out.


{comments off but let's continue the conversation on IG}


11 Mar 2016

Flashback Friday


I'm holding my little boy right now and throughout today I've been holding. He's growing so fast. I miss that newness. Do capture the moment, they grow too fast!

3 Mar 2016

6/52




AOI: I never pose her she is just natural. Looking up for fun, hiding a smile. We were pretending to be in a forest just outside the building outside their playgroup.

AOI and TOI: Painting with precision the barn their daddy built for them.

TOI: He loves Violet and Victor's second book.

1 Mar 2016

JOURNAL PROMPTS: FEBRUARY


1 | “You change your life by changing your heart. ” | Experiencing the Heart of Jesus 109p What does that mean? Are there changes that need to take place in your heart?
Oh boy, this is what I needed to read. This is so true. I'm a person that if my heart is heavy my how life feels so run down. There is definitely changes that need to take place in my heart. I want to let go of past mistake from my side and other people too. The wrong that were down to me are so strong that I can see them affecting the way I live my life, but I don't know how to let that change in heart g

o. I have to pray more to God and let everything into His capable hands.
2 | What is/are your love languages? (Take a quiz here.) How does this show up in your life?
The score to the quiz shows that my love language is WORDS OF AFFIRMATION. 
Actions don't always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, "I love you," are important – hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. Kind, encouraging, and positive words are truly life-giving.
 This is so true, I love it when my husband out of the blue says something encouraging. Word are very important to me and I find it difficult to forget some words said in a moment of frustration. 


After my last book reading, during which my husband took the initiative to film me, I was so happy when at the end of the evening my husband said "I'm so proud of you. I really enjoyed your reading and I wanted you to read more." My was so much happy for hearing those words. 
3 | How do you feel about Valentine’s Day? 
I don't mind Valentine's Day but I don't make a big deal about it because a person should show love each single day. It shouldn't be a commercialized festivity to push you do something for your loved one. This year we spent a quality time with the family playing in the snow and it felt better than buying chocolate and something that will then end up in a drawer. Memories are more cherished.
4 | How well are you loving the people in your life?
I can improve on this. As a freelance writer and photographer, I'm learning to balance this new role I've added to motherhood and wifehood. I want to put into action plan that will allow me to spend quality time with the kids, my husband and to take care of my health.
5 | What broken pieces of your heart need healing so that you can live more freely?
Once up a time there lived a young naive bride in a bubble. The outside world was not so scary, she kept old friendship going. The husband made new friendship that the wife couldn't relate to. Her husband loved her, so she relied on that love to be confident in herself. 
One day a wicked witch came to take hold of her husband. The bride's world shuttered. Her confidence ran away from her, the husband became mean. He saw how the witch is confident and her ambitious. All qualities that the bride possessed but were overlooked by the husband because it was nothing that he could relate to. Her heart was broken into pieces. 
Thanks to her fairy godmother, the bride managed to save her marriage. But her bubble was forever broken. She lived cautiously on earth not believing in relationships. Years passed, her heart healed a bit more. She felt affection for her husband but not love. She started to love him a bit more after the birth of their first child. But the past peeked its head into the present and brought worse news. Her world flipped revealing the ugliness of life.  
Years and God are the only best cure to a broken and fearful heart.

_____________

linking with REGINA


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